Mini FR, A Baby Step

I have been trying to do two things lately: day game, and integrating game into my daily life so that it’s an intrinsic part of who I am. I made meager progress on both these fronts with an approach at Sweetgreen today.

Approaching in a contained day venue was kind of scary, but there was this cute girl sitting across from me and I just kept thinking I had to do it. Plus, it seemed she kind of glanced over at me a couple times. I sat there for a bit after I finished, thinking “was I really going to do this”?

Luckily, I did. I just went with “what did you get” and she was pretty receptive and told me. Unfortunately, it was just a 4 sentence interaction about that.

So I am pissed that I didn’t push it further, but at the same time happy that I did an approach that was scary for me. I am fine approaching at night, but I really had the fear in the back of my mind in this venue, an eatery during the day, that “everyone would be watching”. Luckily, my desire to practice game won, and I was able to do an approach of a type I hadn’t before.

My approach was good too; it was innocuous, and it gave her a chance to indicate receptiveness. Because she seemed receptive enough, I should have followed up with something alone the lines of “look, I need to go in a couple minutes, but I’d like to at least find out if you’re as interesting as you are cute” or something.

I just foolishly ejected prematurely. I also thought I saw a ring, and fleetingly thought maybe she was married, although she seemed quite young. I don’t know if that was a major reason why I ejected, but it’s the kind of thing I would like my brain to stop looking for. I should only be looking for IOIs, not reasons to eject.

This has been a big sticking point for me, actually; I don’t have a real game plan when the girl is receptive/interested because I’m mentally stuck in the reality where I assume she’s not going to be, even though I keep going out and getting some degree of interest/reciprocation.

I’ve stopped watching much material lately; I should probably stop altogether for a bit and let my skills catch up to my knowledge. It’s not like I don’t know what to do most of the time, it’s that I have strongly ingrained habits to not do those things, to be passive with girls, to assume they don’t like me even though all this going out is giving me plenty of hard evidence that a lot of girls do like and react positively to me. My knowledge is far enough ahead of where I am that it almost feels detrimental; I beat myself up for not doing things as best as I know I theoretically should, and sometimes these expectations I hold of myself are unreasonable. I wish I could feel more proud of myself than frustrated right now.

Good

  • Did my first ever approach in this type of situation.

Bad

  • Ejected prematurely even though the girl seemed receptive. Should have followed up with the aforementioned way of stating intent.

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